The new Vauxhall advert featuring their Crossland 4x4 is a metaphor for our times; and a funny one to boot.

Parents are out en masse to watch their offspring play a particularly muddy game of rugby. Numerous tackles, dropkicks, and touchdowns later, the game ends in tumultuous applause. So far, so good.

The problem with being a Nigerian is that, delightful as it is, it sometimes dulls the senses. And before you bring out the knives, let me explain!

The first time I witnessed a peaceful-demonstration-gone-awry in London, the police were at a definite disadvantage. I matter-of-factly asked, "Where are the riot police?" Trouble was, it was mid-afternoon, in the office. Everyone in my section swung round, more confused than me…